This is a story. A story about a person, who is just like you and me. Let’s say her name is Alison. She is in her twenties struggling for getting a decent job after her graduation. She sent many applications for jobs but due to this pandemic, she is not getting one. Finally, after some hurdles she lands on a decent job with low salary. She was happy. At least she got a job! After working for one to two weeks she found out, due to her naïve nature everyone around her is taking advantage of her. Her seniors, her colleagues, her team mates etc. She thought, she should not speak about this because she needs that job and if you are in need then you’ll have to hear any donkey’s rant. So she ignored and let it slides all the incidents which had happened with her. Her confidence level started to drop. Self respect level was almost zero. She found herself getting frustrated, sad and anxious all the time. She started making mistakes in her work too. She was fed up. After some days, her limit was crossed. She wanted to stop all this toxicity. But a problem is there. She needs the job.
My next story is about Gabriella. She is also struggling to find jobs. She is in her 30’s. She is not married but she has a boyfriend. Her boyfriend is heavily loaded with money. But that’s not her money according her opinions. She needed job for herself. Her family, her boyfriend, everyone around her is pushing to get married and settle down in her life; after all she is in her 30’s. She also started getting frustrated and questioning herself of her caliber. She pushed herself to an extent but her hard work is not getting any results. She thought, is it even worth it to find a job? Or she should listen to her family and get married?
Well, both situations are different. Both women have a generation gap of 10 years. Their problems are different. One is fed up of her work environment and other one is fed up of ‘getting settled in 30’s’. But they have a common issue. They are compromising their Self worth because of their situations. Alison needs job and Gabriella’s age problem. We all are just like these two. We contemplate our decisions for our self worth. We think that self worth, self value is only for riches or those who have power and money. As a commoner, we never complain about it and we just have to accept the oppression. This is where we wrong! Just because you are in need you should not accept any kind of oppression on yourself. We say, ‘This is reality’ but ‘this reality’ can have much more effect on your future. Once oppressed will be always oppressed.
Ignoring our self worth and saying yes to any situation will harm your mental health too. In case of Alison, after going from everything she had a mental breakdown where she couldn’t handle her emotions. And in case of Gabriella, she left her boyfriend and cut all her contacts with her family and stops every effort she was putting for her job. These two have had enough. This could be your situation too if you let yourself get pressurized by peer. Your brain will have that end point of being resilient.
Well, what is self worth? How you value yourself is your self-worth. Let’s take an example, you are doing something you like and you are happy with it then suddenly, someone ask “Is it worth it?” this question captured all your attention and you start doubting yourself. Do I have that potential? What is meaning of this? Why I am doing this even? Then this confusion changes your thought process and you started doubting your self-worth. In other case, nobody questions you but you yourself only, let others crush your self-worth. You think you are nobody. Everyone is around you are perfect in every way. ‘You are worthy of nothing.’ This sentence changes everything in your life.
I will not say any kind of motivational quotes like you are special you should know that, you are worthy of everything, be badass don’t let others to get you like that. If someone started to question your self -worth or said you are going to be failure then ladies and gentleman, tell them only one thing,
“You are not God, you too are struggling for yourself and nobody knows the future so your words are nothing but the ripples of vacant waves in air!”
According to Merriam-Webster’s definition of Self worth :
“A feeling that you are a good person who deserves to be treated with respect”
We often get confused with self respect and self worth and other terms of self. They are closely related to each other with just slight difference in them. For example, self- respect means having opinions for yourself, respecting your opinions and yourself and self worth is seeing yourself as something. That you deserve everything and you are worthy of everything. (Don’t worry! This is just definition and I’m sticking on my not so motivational Post)
I just wanted to tell you even if you need something now desperately, have some time to think of the future effects of letting yourself down. When you are at zero, you not need to be afraid of anything because you’ve got nothing to lose. Speak up for yourself in any situation. If you think you are adjusting something then let me tell you adjustment is far different than letting yourself down. Adjustments are done for the situations not with the behavior of someone.
What are your opinions on this?
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